Category: inside the mind of the insane

inside the mind of the insane

“Everything for love”

On Monday I went to the live taping of Dancing With The Stars with La Madre De Bestía. Great time. She’s a lot of fun. Very vulgar too. I like it lol. Of course we ended on up talking about bestía. It was brief. But her catchphrase for me “Everything for love”. I do it all with pure intentions from my heart. I’ve questioned myself. But I always end up at the same conclusion. She appreciates what I do and why I do it. It’s not always fair to me but I don’t care. If it gets stripped away again… I’ll lose it. But I don’t worry about that. I just do my best to control what I can and maybe the god(s)(ess)(es) will take of us.
Everything for LOVE.

In a flash

Seems like we’ve been through it all already
We will battle again
But will you still be here when the smoke clears?
Inhibitions abound.
What happened to love without the fear?
Are the cheers just smoke & mirrors?
Are you hiding from me or yourself?
Love can’t pay the bills, but it’s a whole ‘nother level of wealth
Sickness and health? We ain’t made those vows
Yet & still, I am bound by my word to give you everything.
And give, I will. Until I have nothing.
Fall and I’ll catch you
Used to say that I’ll match you
Nay. I want to give you more than you could ever give me.
It’s not about paying back or owing you.
It’s about showing you.
Fuck the lectures
Grand gestures.
My actions will speak volumes my voice could never replicate
I pray I get the chance
Cuz it could be gone in a flash
Like that….

The cleanse

Mind body and soul
Body, from a physical stand point, will be the easiest. Ridding myself of the toxins I rejected before but currently have no problem taking in.

Mind and soul; a journey that is never complete. But a task I must take ahold of stronger than ever before. I mustn’t be content with how far I’ve come when I’ve yet so far to go. I should use my progress as a benchmark and a quiet victory in the battle within the entire landscape of the war; I have only scratched the surface.

I was just in a state of deep relaxation. Eyes closed. Not a thought in mind. Deep controlled breathing. *knock knock knock*. I’m at work. Surely this man thought I was sleeping. The 30minutes that passed felt like 1. I need more of this. To continue to push forward to where I want and NEED to be.

My growth hit a bit of a stand still. Entirely my fault. I’ll be back on track. I am on track.

Baby steps: forward

I am better
I deserve better
I am more
I deserve more
I will be better
I will get more
Give me more
I’m putting the pieces together.
I may be a little slow. But I’m getting there.
I’ve come a long way.
I’m still figuring out A LOT.
Bare with me.
Progress.
Separately, we grow, as we are together
As we do, we continue to grow, together
In doing so we will continue to grow together.

still HERE

i keep trying

is it me? is it you?

can we make a comeback? or am I destined to be DOOMed again?

just a couple of months ago it was a dream. we talked. we loved. we laughed . we shared.

I’m all in.

i think it’s all in your head. no matter how much i try to help. i just can’t. I just have to support you as best as I can until you figure it out.

when you do, hopefully i’m still the love of your life. because you are mine. soul mate(s).

I hope you find peace of mind. I pray for you all the time.

if I one day am no longer apart of the plan? well, it doesn’t matter, so long as you achieve the freedom you seek.

I’ll be here for you, Love. forever. FOREVER.

❤

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