I sat back and took a look at myself. I have progressed quite a bit. It’s an everyday process. Constantly fending off that which can derail me. It’s interesting how it was just a snap decision every time I decided change was necessary. Will power. Strength of the mind. The body and spirit soon followed. One nagging thought during the state of reflection. This is the man I am; was this the man I always was and always supposed to be?
This was the person YOU saw me for. The person you saw in me. The person you knew I’d grow into. The problem is I wasn’t this for YOU. So I had another “oh what we could’ve been” moments. We were special. That bond was something else. It’s so crazy how much we still get along (at times. And mostly in person). That’s how I know it was you. But this is some cruel lesson I had to learn. And despite all the growth and progress and goals. You’ll stay at the top of the list. Unchecked. Unattainable. Nothing’s impossible? False. Another Again is not possible. Shit our “friendship” is being (slowly/quickly?) put to rest (if you haven’t deaded it mentally already). I even just miss hangin out with you. The platonic love. I like talking to you because you understand. Understand me. Such a fucking rare gem you are. Man I can wait for your dreams to come true. Don’t nobody deserve it more than you. And if you can just get past those mental setbacks. It’s scary to think of the greatness you can attain and the incredible indescribe love you have. For you I’ll be here. And even though you won’t use me. I’ll be here for you until forever. So now I’ll be continuing to move forward because that’s what I can control.
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